Friday, June 24, 2011

Inspiration from a song

This song is on Ben's video I posted a few days ago. You really need to listen and understand what the words are saying. This song really speaks to me and I wanted to share the words.

Fix You by Coldplay

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

From high above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know just what you're worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face when you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down your face and I...

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes

Tears stream down your face and I....

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you


You need to listen to this song. It's become my new favorite. It's really speaks to me and how I'm feeling. As it says if you never try you'll never know. Too many tears have streamed down my face over this whole weight loss situation and now it's time to fix me and learn from my mistakes.
~Crystal

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, June 23, 2011

WWED (What would Elizabeth Do?)

I have the greatest WW leader EVER!  I'm not saying that just because she read this blog either.  I have been a member of WW since 2001.  That's 10 years in case you're counting!  You'd think by now I would be super skinny and know everything there is to know about losing weight and being fit...I DON'T.  I've had my ups and downs with my weight loss journey, mostly my weight has been up and my motivation down, but through it all Elizabeth has been there motivating me and encouraging me all the way.  I don't know what I would do without her.  We've laughed together, we've cried together, she's seen my kids grow up...shoot they probably know as much about WW as I do.  We were just talking about this today in the meeting.  When you know you're eating something you shouldn't and you wonder to yourself, "What would Elizabeth think?" or "What would Elizabeth do in this situation?"  She talked about how I had taken a picture of her and I said maybe I need that picture on my refrigerator, cabinets, the fridge out in the garage and the deep freezer in the garage.  I do have her permission to share said photo with you all so hopefully she won't kill me for this!  So, without further adu...my wonderful and loving WW leader Elizabeth!!!
She really isn't as mean as she looks...honest!  She did this at my request over a year ago and this is the photo I should have posted everywhere!  It might make me think twice and think WWED?

LOVE YOU ELIZABETH!!!  YOU'RE THE BEST!!!  I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WOULD HAVE DOWN ALL THESE YEARS WITHOUT YOU GUIDING ME AND ENCOURAGING ME TO STICK WITH IT!!!
~Crystal

Little Goals = Big Victories!

I decided it's time to get re-motivated and recommitted to this whole weight loss thing.  After my month of May debacle with the bad weigh ins and bad food choices and just all around bad behavior it's time to get back with it.  I'm going to start by setting some small goals.  I REALLY should have already lost 15 lbs by now and so that is my goal for my next weigh in.  In order to reach that goal I need to lose 1.2 lbs this week.  That seems attainable if I just stay committed to my allotted points and really try to work in all the good health guidelines.  So, here are my goals for this week:
  1. TRACK, TRACK, TRACK
  2. Exercise at least 5 out of the next 7 days
  3. Get all the Good Health Guidelines in each day
  4. Take some time for myself, whether it's reading a book or just committing myself to the exercise, that's my time and I'm going to use it to recharge my batteries so to speak
Those goals seem easy enough, but sometimes when you're not motivated enough they fall by the way side.  I did this a couple of weeks ago with my exercise regimen, but after day 3 I lost the motivation and will power.  I'll check back in next week to let you know how doing these things affected me at the scale.
~Crystal

Weigh in 6/16/11 & 6/23/11 (Crystal)

I somehow missed blogging about my weigh in last week.  I don't know how I missed that considering it was the first time I had lost since May 12th!  Like I said though, I had no one to blame but myself.  I wasn't trying and was falling back into that rut of, Why should I do this? This isn't working for me?  I'm bored...I even missed 2 meetings from the May 12th meeting until June 2nd! 

Anyway...I weighed in thinking it would be the same as it had been for the previous 3 weigh-ins.  I went into the meeting and sat down and after sitting there for a few minutes I finally decided to look at my weight log book.  Down 0.8 lb!  I was SO happy!  I still wasn't doing EVERYTHING that I should be doing (and I'm still not 100%), but it was better than nothing or staying the same.  I was able to get my 5% lost out of hock and that made me feel pretty good!  If you don't know WW sets small goals for you to achieve.  The first one is 5% of your starting weight.  My 5% was 13 lbs and I did that on 6/16 with my weigh in of 232.2 lbs down a total of 13.4 lbs lost.

Today's weigh in I was expecting a little bit of the same thing, but was pleasantly surprised with a 0.4 lb loss.  A loss is a loss is a loss!  Down to 231.8 for a total of 13.8 lbs lost.

Slowly but surely I'm chipping away at this...even if it's 0.4 lb at a time.  Slow and steady wins the race or in this case keeps the fat off!
~Crystal

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Kids running

In an effort to keep my children busy this first few weeks of summer vacation I signed them up for a summer running clinic that is put on by our local Road Runners Club.  They meet twice a week for an hour and run, but it's not just straight running.  They are teaching them about stretching, conditioning, pacing, etc.  They are getting them ready to run the Fast Track Mile on July 4th.  The first day my son couldn't make it because he had a tournament game, but my daughter went.  She loved it!  She even wanted to run more after it was over.  That day they did a total of a mile.  I walked a little while they were running.  I tracked 1/2 a mile then I came back to check on them and was just kind of standing around and one of the moms there asked if I'd like to walk with her.  I did and was glad that she asked or I would have just stood around when I should have been exercising.  I ended up with a total of 1 3/4 miles.

The 2nd day both of my kiddos went and they loved it!  After I dropped them off I looked up and saw my dear husband.  He stopped by to see what the kids were doing and to walk with me.  That was so sweet of him.  We ended up walking 1.8 miles...I was hoping for 2 miles!  The kids were so pumped after they were finished and I was surprised because that had been such a busy day.  My daughter had a tennis lesson, we went bowling, they did their running thing and afterwards they ran around at the softball field while my husband played ball. 

I'm so glad that I signed them up.  We'll be doing the Fast Track Mile as a family and to me that means so much.  It is so much more than I would have been doing a year ago.  We are becoming a more active and healthier family day by day.
~Crystal

Excited for fellow blogger

I'm so excited for a fellow blogger.  Ben from Ben Does Life, his Pa and brother have set off on a Do Life 5K tour to get the word out about fitness and just getting out there and Doing Life. They'll be meeting up and running/walking/skipping/jogging a 5K and then meeting up to have a meal and talk afterwards. 

Ben's Story in video form...Have some tissues handy...
Do Life Tour video
 I will be making the trek from here to St. Louis to meet up with Ben and his family and hopefully some other bloggers next month.  You should check him out and check out the tour dates.  He is very motivational and was one part of starting this blog!  Thanks Ben...and Pa...and Jed!
~Crystal

Friday, June 17, 2011

Vegas! (Hope)

I haven't posted this past week, because I was on VACATION!!  My husband and I went to Vegas to celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary, which was on May 18th.  We also celebrated both of us turning 40!  My husband, Kenny, turns the big 4-O on June 29th, and I turn 40 on July 4th!

We had the best time!  We were able to tour the hotels and casinos, have drinks by the pool, and go out to dinner every night.  We gambled just a bit, and decided that if we were going to be losing money, we might as well go shopping!

I wasn't concerned about my diet, because we walked at least five miles every day.  It was hot, but at least it was a dry heat, so I wasn't dripping with sweat.  Our resort had a super nice gym, but I forgot to pack my running shoes!  My husband ran 4 miles every day, and ran the strip once.  I thought he was crazy to run in that heat, but he felt better afterward. 

As much as I enjoyed the time with my husband, I was happy to be reunited with our four kids and get back to our busy lives!  I bought a bunch of fruit at the grocery store last night, and took the little boys for a walk with Megan tonight.  I went to weigh myself this morning, but the battery in my scale was dead, so I need to buy a new one.  I don't think I have gained, though, because my mom gave me three pairs of capris that are 2 sizes smaller than I am used to wearing, and 4 sizes smaller than I wore in February, and they fit!  That's pretty exciting!  I'll have to post my weight when I replace the battery, but until then, here are some pictures from my fabulous vacation with my husband!















Can't wait 'til my next vacation!
~Hope

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Discouraged...Disgusted...Disappointed

This can easily describe the way I'm feeling right now. 

I'm discouraged with my eating/exercise habits over the last month and a half. 

I am disgusted by the things I have been eating. 

I am disappointed that I haven't been able to have more willpower and that I haven't been keeping on top of the eating/exercise. 

I have no one to blame but myself.  And the only person I'm hurting is myself. 

When will I learn to take care of me and my needs? 
When will I learn to take a little time for myself and focus on what I need and what my body needs? 
I'm not a selfish person, but maybe I need to become one. 

I have been avoiding my weekly weigh-in posts because to be honest I have weighed the same since May 14th!  This is all my fault too!  I know that I need to buckle down and really keep track of what I'm eating and how much I'm eating.  I'm finding myself stressed about little things and going to the salty chips and the sweet candy bars for comfort when I need to look elsewhere for that comfort.

I feel like my body/mind is self sabotaging itself.  It almost seems subconscious, but I know somewhere deep down it's not.  I know what I'm doing, but then it's like I look back and think, "Did I really just eat that?  I don't even think I tasted any of that!"  These are things that I haven't looked at during this journey and I'm laying it all out there for everyone who reads this to see.  I have faults and have stumbled HARD the last month and a half.  Now it's time to own up to it, move past it and try to start again.   I need to evaluate my thoughts and actions and really think about what I'm doing to my body.  I wish I could go away for a day or so and just be with my thoughts, but that's not possible right now.  I think I'm going to have to get up early in the morning and just have some time to think and time to blog about what I'm thinking/feeling.  I'm going to be hashing it out here for the everyone to see, but that was the whole point of starting this blog.  We started this to be a public journey, now I'm just letting everyone in a little deeper into what I'm feeling.  It's raw and real, but sometimes that's the way it has to be.
~Crystal

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Light reading

I'm sitting here at the hair salon having some "me" time getting my hair conditioned and reading a book that I'm going to tell you more about later. But this is how I know this book is for me. There's a paragraph that says, "This book is for all you women who know you're too nice, who recognize somewhere deep inside that overdoing for others leaves nothing for you, who don't get why you can't stop eating when you're not hungry, who feel the need to apologize for any particle of your being that isn't wholesome and angelic, who take care of others with love and take care of yourself with food, who work too hard on being perfect, live to please others, think no and say yes, and have to make things right for everyone." I will review this book as soon as I'm finished, but I like where it's going already. I totally do exactly what this says. I'm a yes person, but thinking why did I just say yes to that. Take care of myself with food, I do that. Overdoing for others while not doing for myself, I do that too. Other than being here at the salon, which by the way I've rescheduled twice because I was either called to sub at school or volunteered for something at school (which I love to do), I don't do for myself. My time is spent being a Cub Scout leader, Girl Scout leader, I volunteer at school (which, again, I love to do) and all the other duties that come from being a mom. I've lost myself and the ability to take care of myself. Hopefully at the end of this book I'll get some clarity on where I'm going wrong.
~Crystal


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

A Drive and a Walk

Today was the first day of summer vacation for the kids!  My daughter is starting out in style....with a DRIVER'S PERMIT!!  I can't believe that my daughter is old enough to drive, but she is!  My husband and I let her practice driving around the subdivision after dinner.  Later on, she and I walked a 5K together and talked about how she is growing up.  I absolutely loved spending that time with her today and am dreading the day she heads off to college.  I will savor every minute of the next three years!



She's such a cute little driver!
~Hope

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Hope's Activity 6/7/11

I feel great!  I got up and took the kids to school and then came home to walk/jog a 5K.  My right hip has been giving me problems since the day that I ran 4 miles, so I started out walking.  Once I got warmed up, I could walk faster, and then eventually run without the pain.  It's the strangest thing!  I can go from a painful walk, to running comfortably after moving for awhile.  However, once I get home and sit down for a bit, then try to get up, my hip is really stiff and painful again.  Must be old age!  Anyhoo, I am well on my way to earning the Presidential Active Lifestyle Award!
~Hope

Monday, June 6, 2011

Walked a 5K for fun!

I walked my subdivision tonight.  Twice around, including all cul-de-sacs and the entrance is the distance of a 5K.  I walked the first time around with Kenny and the boys in the stroller.  Ethan and Jacob got a little fussy toward the end, so Kenny took them in to give them a bath and get them ready for bed, while I continued the second lap around.  I think that I am going to run every other day, and walk the days inbetween.  My goal is a 5K every day.  Ethan, my little two year old, has really taken an interest in running.  He loves to get out of the stroller and run like crazy.  He tripped and scraped up his knee tonight, but then popped up and started running again.  I love to see him so active!  He may be my little running buddy one day!
~Hope

Exercise regimen

I have to say exercise to me is like a bad word.  I know people say that you should look at this time as your time and that it should be viewed as "fun".  HA!  When you are this big exercise is not fun!  I keep waiting for it to be fun or even enjoyable, but I'm just laying it all out there...IT'S NOT!  I hope to one day be at that point, but I'm not right now.  But I do have to change how I view exercise and the frequency with which I exercise.

{Okay, time for a confession.  I have done little to no exercise since the day I did the two 5Ks in one day.  I think the only think I've done since then was going one day to Zumba and I don't even think I gave my all on that day.}

So, I'm going to tackle this challenge one day/week at a time.  I've made myself a schedule and I hope to stick to it.  I'm mixing it up a little and not doing the same thing day in and day out.  This is just what works for me now in this moment.

Monday, June 6th
____C25K Week 1 Day 1
Brisk five-minute warmup walk.  Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes.  Five-minute cool down walk.
____3-4 mile bike ride
____100 sit-ups

Tuesday, June 7th
____Swimming
____100 sit-ups

Wednesday, June 8th
____Zumba 60 minutes
____100 sit-ups

Thursday, June 9th
____C25K Week 1 Day 2
Brisk five-minute warmup walk.  Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes.  Five-minute cool down walk.
____3-4 mile bike ride
____Swimming (?)
____100 sit-ups

Friday, June 10th
____C25K Week 1 Day 3
Brisk five-minute warmup walk.  Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes.  Five-minute cool down walk.
____3-4 mile bike ride
____Swimming (?)
____100 sit-ups

Saturday, June 11th
____Zumba 60 minutes
____100 sit-ups

Sunday
____3-4 mile bike ride
____100 sit-ups
Or Day off

Okay, another problem I have is focusing on one aspect of this weight loss journey.  I hyper focus all or nothing on either the eating or the exercise, but never the two things at the same time.  This week I'm going to try and do both things combined.  What a concept!  I'll be posting my progress next week to see if I was able to check all of these off of my list.
~Crystal

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Running the Road

Well, I have started running on the road instead of running on my treadmill.   There is something about seeing that you are actually going somewhere that makes the time pass by more quickly for me.  I also feel that it is better preparing me for running 5Ks.  As of right now, I have only been running in my subdivision, but if I get better at it, I may venture out into some hilly terrain.  I would love to be able to run without restrictions.  I am trying to get used to the heat and humidity, but not faring so well.  I sweat more than anyone I know, and believe me, I am not exaggerating!  Tonight, I waited until 9:00 to run so the sun wouldn't be beating down on me.  I ran 2.6 miles in 29:49.   Maybe I'll run 5K tomorrow!  We shall see! ~Hope

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Bowling and Presidential Active Lifestyle Award

Carter came home from school yesterday with information for a free summer bowling program.  Lots of bowling alleys from across the country are participating to help kids become more active during the summer months.  I had seen information about this program on Facebook, so we were already signed up.  So, from now until the end of August, each of my kids can bowl two free games a day!  I would never take them bowling EVERY day, but the option is there any day we want it.  We only have pay for the shoe rental, which is only $1.50 per child.  When you sign up, they give you the option to purchase the family pass.  For $24.99, you can add four adults who will get the same deal.  I added Kenny and my parents.  It will be great for those rainy days when there is nothing to do. 
Along with the bowling program was some information on the Presidential Active Lifestyle Award.  I checked out the website and was thrilled!  Kenny and I have been wanting to lead a more active lifestyle with our kids and set a good example for them, so this is the perfect program for the summer!  The program lasts eight weeks and can be completed individually, or as a group.  I signed us up as a family so that we would all be involved and motivated to be more active.  The requirement for children is to engage in some sort of physical activity for 60 minutes a day, 5 days a week.  Adults are required to complete 30 minutes, 5 days a week.  Children must be at least 13 years old to be registered online, but Carter can still log activities with us.  There are lots of activities to choose from, so there is something for everyone.  Really, anyone can get involved regardless of their physical fitness.
After the Presidential Active Lifestyle Award, we will then move on to the Presidential Challenge.  In the challenge, you log activities for which you are assigned points.  As the points accumulate, you will be awarded Presidential medals.  For example, if you reach 40,000 points, you receive the bronze.  There are higher point values for the silver and gold.  The ultimate award, the platinum medal, is awarded to individuals reaching 1 million points!
I am looking forward to all of the fun activities that our family will participate in this summer!  Hopefully, Kenny and I can instill an active lifestyle in our kids and they will live long, happy, healthy lives.
~Hope

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Not giving up...not quitting

Okay, I need to have a pity party for a minute!  Over the course of the month of May I have felt like such a failure and such a disappointment.  Yes, May started out wonderful in the fact that I was able to do my first official 5K and I finished in a reasonable time, but since then and since the other two 5Ks that I did this month has been terrible.  Hope said it so well, her post could have been mine.  I haven't exercised other than the 5Ks, I haven't ate well (at all), I haven't tracked, I've only weighed in once!  What is wrong with me!  I know what to do and I had been doing it.  I guess you get burnt out and you just need a break.  I was reading Ben's blog and he said this:

"We’re going to need those months where
we enjoy life and we don’t concern ourselves
with every single thing we are doing “wrong.”
Yes, we have to stay committed and focused,
but for god’s sake, we will go insane and
probably fall off completely if we don’t have
some reasonable debauchery every now and then."

I read this and it was like a light bulb went off!  We are going to have those "off" days/weeks/months and we can't beat ourselves up over it.  We just have to pick ourselves up and go on.  Don't totally ignore the fact that we've really screwed up the last few days/weeks/months, but take it as a learning experience and move on from it.  I'm taking this day, June 1st, as a new and fresh start to this journey.  I'm going to do like Hope said, more posting and really track what I'm eating and how much I'm exercising.  Thanks for sticking with us for this commercial break and I hope that we're back to our regularly scheduled programming!
~Crystal

Two 5Ks in one day! Craziness!

Yes, you read that right.  Even though I've had a bad month I did do two 5Ks in one day!  There's nothing that can explain that other than pure craziness!  The first one I did was for an actual time and was an organized 5K, I got a shirt and everything!  LOL!  I was so happy that my family was there supporting me, even though one of my children didn't appreciate being woken up so early in the morning and was in a bad mood.  My wonderful husband was there and took some photos of me.  The first 5K was the ZoomTown 5K Covered Bridge Run/Walk in Parke County, IN.  It was set against two covered bridges which the area is know for, there's a festival and everything! 
When I went to get my bib I was given the option to run or walk.  I chose to run, but they said you could walk during the run but you couldn't run during the walk.  After I had my bib for a few minutes and thought about it, I decided to walk instead of run.  I didn't want to dissappoint myself if I couldn't run due to the fact that it was all hills and valleys.  I was happy with my choice to walk. 
Not sure what I was thinking about or who I was looking at here! 
You can't read my shirt, but it says "If you can read this then I'm not last!"

I started off really well, but when I hit mile marker 1 I thought, "What!"  I thought I had gone farther.  I was walking at a good pace, but those hills really slowed me down.  Then I saw the 1/2 way mark and I saw something waiting for me...my husband was standing there taking pictures and there was my daughter standing there with my water bottle!  She is so sweet!  She said to me, "Do you need a drink Mama?"  It was all I could do to fight back tears!  I could have just stopped there, but I knew I had to keep going. 

I was never so happy to see that covered bridge in my life!  I don't know if it was the hills or what.  I was glad I had finished it.  I had signed up, set my mind to do it and I did it.  I accompished something that I wouldn't have done a year ago and that to me was an accomplishment!
I finished with a time of 51:07 (minutes) and I was happy with that for having walked the whole thing.  I was hoping to finish in 45 minutes, but the hills slowed me down quite a bit!

Then it was on to the next 5K!  That day was the Walk It Challenge for WW and our local meeting was having two that day.  I couldn't make it to the first, but I was going to make it to the 2nd one for sure!  Hope had said she was going to do it with me and I'm glad I had someone to do the 2nd one with.  I needed someone to keep me going or it would have been slow going for me.  We walked and talked and we completed that one in 51:29 (minutes).  I was happy with that time considering by that time I was completed soaked and was exhausted!  All in all I would have to say it was a good day, but you'll have to read my next post to find out why I haven't done anything since then!
~Crystal

Crystal's Weigh in and Measurements 5/14/11 (Long overdue)

Wow!  It's been a long time since I've posted anything!  It's also been a long time since I've officially weighed in at WW.  I've been working on Thursdays and I don't really like any other meeting.  I'll definitely be back to regularly scheduled Thursday weigh-ins this week.  So here was the official numbers from May 14th...seems like forever ago.  I was down to 233 which was 0.6 of a pound.  But I was happy with that.  No longer am I going to say that it's only -0.6 lbs.  It's a loss and that's all that matters to me!  Plus I'm really starting to notice it in my clothes and I had to buy new bras...TMI right?

Oh, my these photos are going to be the death of me.  I was doing so well to take them faithfully every week, but have really slacked off in that area too.  But as I'm looking at these pictures next to each other, I am noticing big changes.  For one thing the green shirt I was able to shop in my closet and was able to wear it again.  This was a favorite of mine until the middle band just accentuated my stomach area in all the wrong ways.  It looks much better now than it did 12 weeks ago!  I also look at the first set of photos and see a very unhappy person.  The second set, while I'm still not happy with where I am, I am much happier than I was 12 weeks ago with myself.

On to the measurements...this is what shocked me.  I might not have had a huge loss at the scale, but I lost a total of 5 1/2 inches!  Let me break it down for you!

Chest ~ 40 1/2" ~ down 1" from last time
down 8 1/2" total
Hips ~ 50 ~ down 1/4" from last time
down 6" total
Waist ~ 38 ~ down 3" from last time
down 10" total
Arms ~ 15 ~ stayed the same
down 2" total
Thighs ~ 23 ~ down 1" from last time
down 6" total
Calves ~ 16 3/4" ~ down 1/4" from last time
down 1 1/4" total
For a total of 5 1/2"
Grand total of 33 3/4" for 12 weeks!

Looking back at this has given me some motivation that I was doing something right and I just need to get back on track and pick up where I left off!
~Crystal