Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I'm still here... (Hope)

Oh my goodness!  I have not had any sort of physical activity since the Weight Watchers 5K walk with Crystal two Saturdays ago, AND I have not kept track of WW points for over a month!  And scale?  What's that?  I have actually been afraid to weigh myself, because I thought for sure that I had gained at least half of what I lost back.  I'm am getting back on track today (again!) so I finally stepped back on the scale.  It still read 181.6.  I can't believe that with all of the junk I have been eating and lack of exercise, that I haven't gained any weight back.  My husband says it's because my metabolism is still high from all of the prior exercising.  I guess I dodged a bullet there!  I just need to get back to exercising before it slows back down again and the pounds start piling on. From here on out, I am going to weigh in every week, no excuses!  I can't believe that I wasted a whole month!  Ugh!  I am hitting the treadmill tonight (When the little guys are in bed).
Just wanted to let you all know that I am back and will post more frequent updates.  Hopefully, with smaller numbers!
~Hope

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Preventable Treadmill Injury

My 15 month old little boy was injured yesterday on my treadmill.  I am heartbroken over the whole incident because he suffered significant burns to his leg and feet.  I shared the story on my family blog in an attempt to prevent this from happening to anyone else.  To read about the unfortunate event that took place yesterday, click here.  And please....NEVER use a treadmill with little ones around.  ~Heartbroken Hope

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Being proud of yourself and your accomplishments

Wow!  Two posts from me in one day!  I meant to include this in the last post, but forgot.  Along with feeling down about the pictures this week, I also got discouraged with my running.  I was on cloud nine just after the 5K because I had met my goal of running the whole thing in under 40 minutes.  However, this week, my husband, who is just a casual runner, meaning that he runs every once in awhile, went out and ran 3 miles in 23 minutes like it was nothing!  I was happy for him, but began to doubt that I could ever become a "real" runner.  I trained a lot just to be able to run the 5K and it wasn't easy for me.  I was discouraged to see that he so effortlessly surpassed my accomplishments with next to no effort at all.  I would love to be able to effortlessly crank out 5 miles a day and run 5Ks like they're a walk in the park (literally).  I became so discouraged that for a few days I thought Why even bother?  I'll tell you why....because if I don't, I will never get any better, and I will never lose the weight.  I may not ever be able to run effortlessly like others, or even complete a 5K in under 30 minutes.  I may not ever be able to completely run a half marathon, or fit into a size 8, but I can take pride in my accomplishments.  I don't want to let the accomplishments of others diminish the value of my own.  Anything that you strive to do and accomplish is worth being proud of!
~Hope

Blog Stalking and Motivation

Okay, so here's the deal....  I was so proud of myself for running the 5K and had been feeling pretty good about my activity level.  I even felt that I had been looking better in my clothes.  Well, all that changed when I saw the pictures from the 5K and some pictures taken from my nephew's birthday party over the weekend.  The truth is, I still look overweight, which is so funny, because why wouldn't I?  I AM OVERWEIGHT!  Do you know why I am still overweight?  I do.  It's because I haven't been following the Weight Watchers points or counting calories. I have just been going with the flow and guess-timating appropriate calorie values for my food.  BAD IDEA!!  I have been hovering around the 180 mark for weeks.  Every week for the past month, I have been saying to myself, "I should be in the 170s next week!"  Well, here it is a month later, and no 170s!
The good news is that I do know what I need to do to lose the weight.  I need to be more active and actually count my calories.  I joined My Fitness Pal a couple of weeks ago, so I need to start using it.  Another thing that I did, today, was "blog stalk" when my two little ones were napping.  I love to read people's journeys and see where they have come from.  There are many inspiring stories out there!  When I say blog stalk, what I mean is, I go to a weightloss blog that I like, look at the followers, and click on them to see if they have a blog.  If they do, and it is inspiring, I become a follower of that blog.  I also look at the list of blogs that they follow, and click on some of them.  It's kind of fun.  Today, I became a follower of someone who lives in Moscow!  If you are struggling like I am, I encourage you to read some of the inspiring stories out there.  They can really get you motivated!  Now that I feel motivated, I am going to try to reach a goal weight of 175 pounds by the time I go to Vegas, which is in about three weeks.  Wish me luck!
~Hope

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Crystal's 5K experience (get comfortable...super long post)


I don't know how to expound on Hope's post other than to give you my viewpoint of the 5K and the time leading up to the 5K.

To anyone that doesn't know this is the largest Mini Marathon with 35,000 people that register for the mini and another 4,000 that register for the 5K run/walk.  I was first signed up to do the One American 500 Festival Mini Marathon in Indianapolis with my husband Craig and my brother.  As the time got closer...the first of January...I started to get nervous.  I knew there was no way that I could walk let alone run 13.1 miles!  I went to my husband and asked him if there was any way to transfer my spot to my other brother.  Thankfully there was and I then signed up for the 5K.  It was around that time that Hope and I had started this blog.  I asked her if there was any way that she'd like to do this 5K with me and she said yes.  It's always better when you have someone to do this with. 

Leading up to the 5K I had been training, but probably not as hard as I should have.  I had been walking to start off with and then would add a bit of jogging in as time went on.  Now mind you my jogging is 4.3 mph on the treadmill.  Yes, it was a jog for me and maybe not others, but I was jogging.  I had only jogged outside on the asphalt maybe twice.  That was making me nervous.  I, like Hope, had so many things going through my head.  I'm too big to do this...I'm going to look stupid...I'm not going to be able to run at all...what if I get half way through and can't finish...what if I have to walk the whole thing.  The what ifs were driving me bananas.  I can't imagine what goes through someones mind that is training for the mini marathon! 

As I mentioned earlier my husband was running in the mini marathon.  We went up to Indianapolis to pick up our packets at the expo hall.  As we were finding a place to park I saw Hope and her husband walking down the sidewalk.  I wondered if I'd be able to find her in all those people.  As we got to the expo hall we ran into Hope and Kenny again!  She had already gotten her packet and Craig and I needed to get ours.  You have to understand that I have always been there supporting my husband and being there to take pictures.  Never had I been there to get a packet for myself.  That alone made it all seem so real.  When we got back with Hope and Kenny, Hope was so excited to have the packet in hand.  Me on the other hand I started to get a little bit of anxiety.  It was finally here and it was all becoming too real for me.  I started feeling sick to my stomach and all those insecurities started to creep back in and take over my thoughts.  But Hope was right there with words of encouragement telling me I could do it and that she was going to be right there and we were going to do this together. 
One day I'm going to Run Disney!  That is my ultimate goal! 
Got my shirt all ready the night before.  Had to personalize it!

I was able to get some sleep that night despite my thoughts and feelings.  I woke up ready to go!  The day was finally here and I was ready to do this.  Craig and I met Hope and Kenny just outside our hotel and as we were walking to get to our corral for the 5K Hope said something to the effect that this was it, we weren't going back to who or what we had been before.  Those words resonated within me.  She was so right.  I am a totally different person than I was at the beginning of the year.  That person would have been here walking down with her husband, camera in tow, ready to take pictures of him running his 5th mini marathon.  That person would be 12 pounds if not more heavier and 28 inches if not more bigger.  That person would be on the sidelines waiting and feeling insecure that she wasn't participating.  The person I was that day was actually a participant! 
My husband and I just before the 5K started.  He's doing the signature finger point that Ben made famous!  You'll have to read Ben's blog to understand this.  http://www.bendoeslife.tumblr.com/
The people behind us 
The people in front of us 
Hope and I getting ready to go
As they counted down to the start of the 5K and we moved closer to the start line my heart started to beat a little faster.  I knew this was it, there was no backing out, no turning back, no quiting.  I started to jog along-side Hope and Kenny.  But soon I got separated from them as we were weaving in and out of those that were going slower than we were.  Hope kept looking behind to see where I was.  Eventually I motioned for here to just go on.  I knew I couldn't keep up with her and had started off too fast.  I was going to have to walk some of the 5K and I didn't want to slow her down.  As I jogged then walked then jogged then walked I was thinking to myself what a failure I was for not being able to jog the whole thing.  As I was being passed by elderly folks and small children this made the thoughts in my head worse.  But at one point I set my eyes on one person and I told myself I was not going to let that person get past me.  I stepped it up the best I could.  At mile 2 all of a sudden a rock flew in my shoe.  I was determined not to stop.  I ran the last 1.1 mile with a rock in my shoe.  To me at that point I didn't care that I had a rock in my shoe because I was going to finish what I started no matter the situation.  At mile marker 3 with only a tenth of a mile to go I could see the finish line in sight.  I thought now is the time!  I picked up the pace and finished strong!  I hadn't let my insecurities win!  I did it!  I had finished something that I had set my mind to!  I was disappointed with my time of 47 minutes and 19 seconds and that I hadn't been able to stay with Hope.  Those thoughts started to creep in again that I had failed because I hadn't done as well as I could have.  But those thoughts melted away when as soon as I got my finishers medal and here came Hope.  She greeted me with a hug and said we did it!  I couldn't have felt better!  Knowing that you have someone encouraging you and congratulating you on something you set your mind to makes all the struggles worth it.  She'll never know how much that moment meant to me.  I almost broke down at that moment.  To some they may say it was only 3.1 miles.  To me it might as well have been a marathon!  For anyone that has struggled with their weight and exercise to be able to accomplish something like this meant the world to me. 
Hope and I with our finishers medals
That's not the end to this story.  After we got our medals and a drink and some snacks we walked around Military Park for a little while and then went to go see the first person cross the finish line and also wait for my husband Craig to finish.  It is a very electric feeling to see that first person cross the finish line with a time of just over an hour.  As we were waiting Hope and I were talking and she says to me can I imagine what Craig is thinking?  She then says that he's thinking of me and how proud he is of me for doing the 5K and that is what is motivating him to keep going.  I had to tell her to stop because I started crying.  I'm a very emotional person and her words meant so much.  I don't know if he was thinking of me at that exact moment, but for Hope to say he was made me feel so good.  It was very exciting to see my husband who has worked so hard cross the finish line with a time of 1 hour 53 minutes and 39 seconds!
My husband and I...a very different picture than last year.

I had a shirt made for after the 5K that I hope I can make good on next year.
As we went to bed that night my husband rolled over and whispered in my ear, "I'm proud of you".  I'm so glad it was dark so he couldn't see me cry.  Those words meant more to me than any finishers medal.  I'm doing it, I'm making the changes I need to make, I'm a better wife and mother because of the choices I'm making.  I'm becoming a better example of what a healthy active mother should be.  I'm doing life! 
~Crystal

P.S.  Sorry this was so long.  I just felt like I had to get this all out for you to get the whole idea of what I was feeling and thinking.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Hope's 5K Experience

Oh my goodness!  I did it! (Crystal did too, but I will let her tell you all about her experience.)  I was a little nervous the week leading up to the 5K because I had never run outside, so I wasn't sure if my legs would hold up against the pounding on the asphalt, and I wasn't sure that I could keep my pace without having my treadmill do it for me.  Lots of things were running through my mind as the day approached:  What if it's windy?  What if it's rainy?  What if I just can't do it?  I couldn't seem to get these questions out of my mind.  But, by Friday, my worries were gone and the excitement hit me.  This was it! This was the day that was going to change the way that I felt about myself.  No longer did I want to be the person sitting on the couch watching "The Biggest Loser" and wishing that something fantastic like that could happen to me.  I didn't want to play the If only... game anymore.  You know what I'm talking about:  If only I had better genes....  If only I didn't sweat so much....  If only I had a running partner....  If only I had more time....  The list of excuses goes on and on.  Race day was the day that I was no longer going to WISH that I was that girl that could do it, but I was going to BE that girl that could do it!  I made up my mind that no matter what, I was not going to walk, not even one step.  I had run more than the 5K distance on the treadmill, so I thought that surely, when push came to shove, I would be able to do it.  Well, I did it!  And, it felt great!  My official time was 38:15, which I am so happy with.  My goal was to finish in under 40 minutes.  It wasn't easy, and actually the last 1/2 mile was a killer, but I did it!  I will never forget the feeling that I had as I crossed the finish line.  It has given me motivation to run more and run faster!  I can't wait to do it again!
Crystal and me with our bibs for the race!

My husband, Kenny, and me before heading out to the corral.

My official time!

My bib and medal.

While I was running, I would say to myself Ben's little phrase that means so much:
"If you want to do it, all you have to do is do it!"
~Hope